Happy New Year, everyone! I hope these first few weeks of 2019 have been treating you well, and I hope that this year is a good one for you! I know some don’t, but personally, I love New Years. I always say I’ll come up with resolutions, and I never do. But this year, I decided that this bad habit of unproductivity (along with many other aspects of my life) needed to change. So it feels only fitting that my first blog post of 2019 is going to be one in which I set my goals and resolutions for this year.
Normally, I don’t believe in the whole ‘New year, new me’ thing. I truly think that if you want to change any part of your life or yourself, there’s no need to wait until the new year to begin working towards improving those things. With that said, the new year does provide a fresh start, as well as the (perhaps much needed!) motivation to begin righting wrongs and striving to make your life the best it can be. However, I also think that these things should be done because you wholeheartedly want to do them, and not because you feel you ‘should’ just because everyone else is, or because our society tells you that you need to. Resolutions for the new year ahead, to me, are kind of pointless if there’s no means for follow-through or action to be taken, and least of all, if you’re setting these goals in order to ‘fit in.’ So my advice to you during this pressure-fueled time is this: If you don’t really feel like making resolutions, don’t. If you do, you’re more than welcome to. But don’t feel pressured just because other people are. Do it because you truly want to! Be the healthiest and happiest version of yourself that you can be!
So, with all that out of the way, here are my 2019 resolutions and goals!
1. Finish the first full draft of my novel.
This was one of my only goals for last year, and for various reasons (major writer’s block, my mental health being in a particularly bad state, finishing high school, etc.) I wasn’t able to complete it. This made me feel very self-critical, and overall just upset, because I couldn’t stick to my goal and didn’t feel I had the motivation to get it done. So this year is hopefully the year I’ll complete it. I just need to get out of this writer’s block first…
2. Read at least one book each month.
Again due to my mental health declining last year, my life honestly became a bit empty. I found that I lost interest in the things that normally brought me joy, like reading and bullet journaling and even watching TV. Whenever I thought of doing any of those things, instead of meeting them with excitement and inspiration, I was disinterested and bored. I didn’t ever feel motivated to pick up a book, or get out my nice colourful pens, or start a new program on Netflix. So this year, I’m planning on changing that in any way I can. One of those ways, which made it onto this list, is by reading more! I didn’t reach last year’s challenge on Goodreads, so this year I really want to push myself and do it. One book a month, AT LEAST.
3. Improve my resume and get a job.
Because my future has been put on hold, due to necessary knee surgeries to fix a recurring issue, I still haven’t got my first job. Being eighteen years old, this is probably really surprising to some. From February of 2017 to June of last year, I had an almost-job in which I volunteered at a local secondhand clothing boutique, which was linked to an organization to help single mothers. It was a great experience, and began mostly as a way to get me motivated and to learn some skills for getting a real job in the future, but then I continued volunteering there (much longer than I’d initially planned to stay) for my high school’s mandatory senior internship class. I know that I have to get a job this year, since I have no means of income, and I’m out of school at the moment. But with everything, it’s going to take some time…
4. Do the things that scare me.
I certainly don’t do enough of this. I have pretty bad anxiety, and I hate to admit this, but it stops me from leading a normal life. It stops me from going out with friends, it stops me from going to parties (not that I’m actually invited to any, but still), it stops me from being motivated to get a job and further my education, and on the especially bad days, it stops me from leaving my house. This year is going to be full of many changes, some I can’t control and some I can, as well as some that are large and some that are small. But one of the ones I can control is stepping out of my comfort zone and taking more risks — even if the things aren’t especially risky. So while I probably won’t go skydiving or bungee jumping, I am planning on leaving the comfort of my home much more often, trying new things, and being more spontaneous, even if just in smaller ways.
5. Create and stick to an exercise routine.
This year, I am absolutely determined (more than ever) to get on top of my health. Exercise and being healthy physically has been proven to have a massive effect on mental health and, of course, overall wellness. Exercising and doing what’s best for my body is something I need, especially when recovering from knee surgery. I want to get my bones strong and build up some muscle, and I just want to be the healthiest I can be. I’ll start off slow, and build up my ‘tolerance’ to exercising, if that makes sense. I don’t want to push myself too hard or overwork my body, just to get good results. I’m not used to vigorous exercise, so jumping right into the deep end probably wouldn’t do me any good in the long run. But I plan to get there, no matter how slowly. I plan to get fitter and healthier.
6. Eat better food and do what’s good for my body.
I still have a lot of research to do about intuitive eating, and how I can optimize my motivation and capacity to nourish my body and give it what it needs to thrive. As I mentioned in a previous blog post, I suffer from something called emetophobia, which is a very severe fear of vomit/vomiting, so because of that, my association with food (and the possibility of food making me sick) has become quite a negative one. My eating habits are pretty unhealthy, and this year I really hope to learn more about healthy eating, and getting the nutrients necessary, and eat the right amount of fruits and vegetables recommended in a day. Because of the same phobia and the anxiety that comes with it, I’ve also lost a considerable amount of weight, and due to also having a very fast metabolism, I don’t put on much weight anyway to begin with. I really need to start eating more, and eating things that’ll help me gain weight in a healthy way.
7. Create and stick to a sleep schedule.
This is something I’ve always had trouble with. Going to bed at a reasonable time! Even when I was in school, I couldn’t stick to a schedule. One night I’d go to bed at 10pm, and the next night, I’d finally fall asleep at 1am. My sleep was all over the place, and still is, which is kind of a representation of how unorganized I am with everything. Falling asleep at all different times also means that I wake up at all different times. Sometimes it’s 7:30, sometimes it’s 9. While I never sleep in past 10 in the morning, I do struggle with being motivated enough to get out of bed before then. For ages I’ve said my sleeping habits are going to change — and surprise, surprise, they never do. I truly think that creating a sleep schedule, even if I eventually end up modifying it, will positively impact my life. I think it’ll make me more motivated, and make me have more energy, as well as help me become a healthier, happier version of myself. Sleep is good, but too much and not enough aren’t!
8. Reduce anxiety.
Over the past few years, and in 2018 especially, my anxiety became what feels…unmanageable. I feel drowned by it constantly, and my thoughts are often negative and very self-critical because of it. I always think, “Why am I like this?” and “Why can’t I be normal, and not freak out about the tiniest little things?” A lot of my anxiety has to do with my phobia, and I’m always terrified of being physically sick when I go out places and do literally anything. To say the least, it’s debilitating and so exhausting, and at eighteen, I don’t want to live like this. This year, I plan to tackle it, by any means necessary. I’m going to do things that scare me, I’m going to seek professional help if needed, and I’m just going to do what I can to improve my life. I understand that it’s unlikely I’ll be able to completely eradicate my anxiety, but I’m going to try and learn to handle it and live with it better.
9. Fix my posture.
This one is a tad random, and doesn’t really fit in with the rest, but I need to fix my posture. Desperately. Too often, I’m bent over looking at my phone or reading a book, and I’ve only noticed how much I do it because my mum tells me to sit up straighter! I also tend to tighten my shoulders instead of letting them relax as I should, which probably makes me look really weird half the time. I don’t know if that is because of how nervous I am a lot of the time, or if it’s just become a habit. But I used to have a good posture, and I really want to get it back. I DO NOT want to become a hunchback at the age of eighteen!
10. Write and publish a new blog post every month.
Finally, I want to become a lot more active on this blog! This is partly because writing blog posts keeps me writing in general, and it keeps my creativity and inspiration flowing. I have a few different ideas for posts, and I’m so excited to build my following and improve my blogging skills! I’m still new at it, and I have a lot to learn, but the most important thing is that I really enjoy running a blog, and talking about things I love / things that are important. So to keep this up, I’ll be trying very hard to publish (at least) one blog post every month! (If you couldn’t tell, this is January’s main one — I apologize for its tardiness! A lot of things have been happening.)
Hope you enjoyed this list of my 2019 resolutions! What goals do you have for this year?